I Don't Want It, I Think
by FabulousLasVegas
Summary: Beka denies that she may like Rosto, but all of her friends know that the two like each other. Now, Rosto exgirlfriend's sudden appearance makes everything a little more complicated. She is in denial and he's a clueless guy. R&R.BxR
1. Hints

**Ch 1: Not So Usual**

BPOV

Before watch

Alas, I haven't really much to say. The usual has replayed itself again as it has for several days. Of course we have had our breakfast meetings and I had to clean up by myself, again. Like I said, the usual.

But, also, I've gotten that tingling feeling again. It's not like I want it, I think, but Rosto was dropping hints during breakfast. This is the usual, but it's different. Sure, Rosto is...handsome, but he is a rusher! Aniki and Kora hint constantly too, and my Dogs have caught on too. My tingles want to give in to the surrounding hints, but my previous experiences have told me not to.

Ok, I'll admit that there are other reasons. I have to take into account of other things that there are reasons, ones that agree with logic and common sense, why I cannot be Rosto's gixie. One, the obvious that everybody sees: he is a rusher and I am a dog! Two, my mother took in many rushers and in return, they beat her and we stayed poor 'til my Lord Provost used my information to find a rat, in fact, the rat that had last hurt my mother. Which leads to another, what would my Lord Provost think? I don't care about My Lady's opinion of my becoming a dog, she doesn't matter as much, but I do care about my Lord Provost's opinion. He encouraged me to become a Dog, to help my people, behind My Lady's back. I also feel indebted to him. He took my family in, has taken care of us and still does, not threatening to throw my siblings out at any moment. Acos of this, I feel obligated to do what he thinks is best or right for not only do I look up to him, but he is also the closet father figure I have.

Alas, I have now realized while writing that I have had an epiphany. Today was not the usual. Today, I came upon a realization I have stubbornly avoided until now. I do like Rosto more than I should. It's not something I'm proud of and I will try to deny it, but its right in my face like My Lady when I arrive at the palace dirty and wrinkled. I can't avoid it much longer. Why did Rosto have to be so good looking with his white hair that he argues is blonde, not white? And the safe feeling that he gives me, how does he do that?

I must go now, watch is coming around and I've to meet Tunstall and Goodwin soon. Pounce is waking from his nap. 'Til tonight, that's if I can manage to write before I sleep. Hope there's something exciting tonight, dare I hope for a bar fight?


	2. David

**A/N: Oops, forgot to do this before.**

**I don't own Beka, Rosto and everyone else, unless I add somebody that isn't in the really awesome Tamora Pierce's books. Otherwise, would I be writing this? Uh… no! I'd be writing something to publish with the big publishers, not fanfiction, or… I would just take Rosto. **

**And thanks for reviewing, I know its only a few, but it was still nice to see.**

**Ch. 2: How Come David Can and I Can't**

**BPOV (not journal)**

"Pounce, get up! Its time to go!" I say. All he does is roll onto his back and purr an annoyed _Two minutes. Is that too much to ask?_

All I do is frown. He may be getting just a little spoiled, but he is The Cat and I still love him to death. I guess I can close my eyes for two minutes. It is a bit early.

Five minutes later…

_Yes, I did say two minutes, but five exceeds two minutes in the number counts. Wake up, David might not be happy. I am asking you to get up._

Pounce. Him. What, David? Oh! What time is it?

_Gods, finally! I was about to demand instead of asking you to get up just to test my powers. I never really use them. To your question, it is three minutes after we were to leave, now six. Let's go. I have a feeling Tunstall brought me something._

Like I said, spoiled.

**Nobody's POV**

While skipping down the stairs, the young Dog did not go unnoticed. Erksen heard her and waved, but she didn't see him. It seemed as if she and Pounce were in a heated argument. He couldn't think of anything serious that could start a fight, so he assumed it was about something of no importance.

And Erksen was right. Pounce had been insulted that Beka considered him spoiled. She had only been teasing at first, but as Pounce heavily disagreed, Beka couldn't help but defend herself in an argument that only began as a joke.

Beka started jogging once she had left the court of the rogue. Her braid swayed and Pounce didn't liked getting smacked by the sharp defense tool at the end of her braid, so he leapt off her shoulder and sprinted on his own way. Argument forgotten, it was a race to the kennel.

Beka rolled her eyes once Pounce left. Of course he left saying the last word and more pride in winning the argument, but she knew they would be at it again if nothing entertaining came up.

Arriving at the kennel, she found David gathering some new protection. He was a second year dog who she had been assigned to work with. He was kind and even though he was no Rosto, he was pretty handsome with playful green eyes, a nearly six foot lean build and brown hair that would not stay down when combed, making him seem as if he had run his hands through it. He also seemed pretty fond of Beka and when she greeted him, his head turned and he winked. Beka inwardly blushed, but joined him to help decide what would be good.

"Hey Beka. I was given permission to replace some of my old stuff. You saw how torn up some of my leathers are. Which one should I get: the neck guard and wrist guards with spikes or the arm braces and gloves?" His head turned to her and she noticed that he already knew her response.

"You already know what I'm going to say, don't you?" She asked. She and David had become good friends and he had even come to the breakfasts sometimes. Everybody accepted him, even Pounce did. Erksen and David often exchanged information and joked with each other when they weren't on watch. The only one who wasn't more than just an acquaintance of David was Rosto. He was a polite cool and only spoke to him only when spoken to. That didn't affect Beka though. She had asked him if it was ok that David came and all Rosto said was "Why wouldn't it be?" So, she assumed that Rosto was fine with it and she remained friends with David.

Struck out of her remembrance, David replied with "Of course I already know what you're going to say. You could be a third year dog if only your insight counted. So, go on ahead and say it."

Rolling her eyes, not able to take a compliment, Beka recited: "You should get the neck brace and wrist protection. The neck brace can save your life and the wrist protection will not only do that, but it's useful in a fight."

Smirking, David said "Thought so." Beka lightly shoved his shoulder and walked outside as she said, "I'll wait outside for Pounce."

**Rosto POV**

Bursting through his door without minding his lock, Kora stared ranting "Someone's waiting at the bottom of the stairs for you Rosto. She won't come up the stairs. She said something about being announced instead of abrupt. She's dressed up all nice and s fussing lots. You should hurry or I'll push you out your door. She's annoying and wont stop wining about this place."

Why in the middle of a good dream did Kora have to come in? "Fine, hold her up for a minute, I need to dress." Again, why?

"Oh, right. Just hurry." Then she left, not minding to close the door. Great, now I have to get up from a good sleep that I need and see a whiny mot about something or other. Perfect. Today couldn't get any better. Not only did David come over today for breakfast, but Beka asked me if it was ok for him to come. Everyone, even Pounce has taken to him: David this, or David and I…. David David David. I can see that he liked Beka, more than just a friend. He even flirts with her and she doesn't do anything about it. She lets it happen. How come he can and I can't? I give her a compliment, she rejects it, ignores it or scolds me for it. He says something nice, she may occasionally reject or ignore it while holding in a blush, but usually, she does blush and returns it thanks him. Why can't I? He hugs her just like Erksen, but she doesn't shy away and when he kisses her cheek, she doesn't scold him, only playfully glaring. When I try to give her nothing more than a friendly hug, she pushes me off or scolds me and says no and that _we_ will never happen. I see how David eyes her and how she doesn't reject him, it hurts to know the only gixie I've loved more than just for a bed warmer or friendly companion sees me as a friend, or maybe even less, depending on the happenings of my court.

Sometimes she says its acos of me being a Rat, and the fact that I'm the king doesn't help either. Otherwise, she tells me it's her mom, or Lord Provost or that sometimes, its me. I've tried and yet I still ask why can David? But I've figured why he can and I cant: it acos he is a dog, and I am a rat, the king of rats. I'm not totally sure, acos sometimes I still think that Beka loves me, like she denying something inevitable. Still, why cant I?

"Rosto! Hurry Up!" Ughh…that's Kora. I should go and talk to this mot.

**A/N: PLZ READ!**

**Hi! So, this is my first fanfic. I usually read the stuff but I saw that there were very few Rosto Beka fanfics so I decided to do one. I was thinking of doing one where it takes place in modern day. I wanted to see if that worked. It'd be harder since crime isn't as easy to make nice like in Terrier. Let me know. Happy Holidays!**


	3. You Have, Haven't You?

**A/N: Thanks for reviewing! Happy Holidays! Oh, and I read this really good fanfic and I put it on my favs, which doesn't usually happen, you should read it! It's called Fallen and it's about Kel. **

**AN: 1/22/08 - I finally changed the eye thing, sorry to those of you who found it annoying.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Beka and Rosto and whoever else. Otherwise, I would be Tamora Pierce and not me.**

**Ch. 3: You've Thought About It, Haven't You?**

**Beka POV**

**After watch**

Sitting in this booth, I was getting a little squeamish. There was nothing to do. David suggested we sit and drink for a while and he said he'd pay. I tried to say I could afford it, but he insisted and said he was redeeming a favor from the barman. I guess it was ok, but I had to reassure him that it wasn't like he was courting me. He agreed, and that's how I ended up sitting here with some bailey water sitting across David who is retelling a tail about Ahuda's training. I've been through it as well and its not like I want to hear more about her, I just recovered from yesterday's "lesson" with her and I have some bruises to prove it. Now, apparently, David was paired with some ok dogs, one of which had a daughter whom he took a liking to. Not good.

"She was named Tolina. Pretty face and a year younger than me. Nothing happened, but something might have if Thomas, my dog, hadn't told me that she was off limits." I was right, not good. Speaking of not so good relationships, I am still in denial, I think. Must repeat to myself _I do not like Rosto, I do not like Rosto, I do not like Rosto, I do not like Rosto, I do not like Rosto. _I do not like his eyes, his whitish blonde hair, his tall and muscular height, and the way he can make feel safe. Oh, wait, David's talking to me.

"…alright? Beka, you ok? Your eyes are closed and you're shaking your head." Oh, hadn't noticed that.

"Yeah. Fine, just thinking." Looking up to see that David's leaned forward figure was now returning to his leaning back against the wall with his long legs resting on the seat. I roll my neck and get up. "We should go, nothing's happening in this tavern and I'm bored."

Raising his eyebrows, David teased "My apologizes for being a boring conversationalist. I will try next time to talk of something other than past gixies."

"Thank you. I'd rather not hear of past mots that you have courted. Its not my favorite discussion topic." I replied. I just wanted to get out and leave.

"Jealous?" I turned around and looked at David with my blue grey eyes. Apparently they can be piercing and cold and this was the perfect opportunity to use it.

"No. We've already talked about this. I will not become your gixie. Anyways, there are plenty of other mots out there. None who are against your charms and available dinners." David shrugged and heaved himself out of the booth, walking beside me.

This had been a topic of conversation a lot. I don't mind his flirting, really. I know this seems weird, but I don't like David like that, just as a friend. He did try and kiss me once, but I backed off and took a swipe at him. He had a bruise on his cheek for a while after that. We don't talk about it anymore, I've forgiven him and all he does is flirt a little less, yet it is still constant.

His flirting I've become accustomed to. Its friendly and he dates other gixies, so I know it isn't serious. Of course, sometimes I still blush and still take his compliments, but I still don't take to Rosto's flirting. I mean I do enjoy it, but what if people knew that I liked Rosto? That wouldn't be good.

Then, I could find David.

I saw him flirting with another gixie and it was Aniki. I couldn't think of why she would be here.

"Aniki!" I said. Both she and David turned toward me. I walked over and first thing David said was, "Finally, you've decided to come down to Tortall from the gods world. What were you thinking about? You have that same look as you did when we were at the bar. Usually you aren't so distracted, always attentive and enforcing the law and all, but you just seem to be somewhere else."

Aniki gave me a questioning look as if to say _Our Beka, not paying attention and taking naughty rats to the kennel._ What could I say? "I was thinking about some things."

"Oh well." Then, awkward silence.

"…Ummm, Beka, isn't your watch over now?" Aniki broke in. "We could go back to the Dancing Dove. I know Pounce is already there with Kora and Erksen. Rosto said he would be late."

I looked up to David and he shrugged. I guessed that was an ok. "Sure. Bye, David. See you tomorrow." Looking to Aniki, I walked toward her, took her arm and walked with her.

"Beka, why are we walking faster than usual? Does it have anything to do with your 'thinking' before? You seem anxious." She asked.

"No, why would I be anxious. It was just thinking, nothing more. Anyways, what were you doing in near the tavern, you're usually closer to the Dancing Dove, not near the kennels?"

She gave me an exasperated look. "It was mainly Rogue business..." I rolled my eyes as she continued, "Rosto had me come and look for you. He has some troubles with a mot. She's very pretty, probably from the Unicorn district, and was wearing a wispy, thin and shimmering light gold dress with some face paint. Apparently, she is an old gixie of Rosto's. She's quite desperate and wants him back. When I left, she was still complaining and whining about not seeing him." It was her turn to roll her eyes then. None of us liked the complainy and clingy mots that Rosto had taken to recently. Aniki and Kora were either taken or not interested in being a bed warmer anymore and neither was I. Rosto must be very fickle, another reason not to like Rosto.

"You said that he had you come for me, why?" I was interested. Why would Rosto need me?

"Oh…" then she pointedly looked away. "He would like you to…umm… pretendtobehisgixiesothatthemotwillleave." Then she closed her eyes as if I was gonna lash out at her. "Don't shoot the messenger please!"

I had stopped walking. Frozen. What, this was exactly what was not supposed to happen. Me, become Rosto's gixie? No, this wasn't supposed to happen in any shape or form! "No, Aniki, I can't. I'm a dog, he's a rat. What would people think?" I didn't even bother to let her answer. "I know what they'd think. They'd think 'Why is a Dog with the Rogue? Maybe she's his bedwarmer for money' or 'What has our government come to?' I can't do it!"

Aniki looked at me astonished. "No one said it would be lasting. Its just temporary, a quick act for a mot that'll leave soon enough. Plus, she doesn't know you and who you are, a dog. She'll just see that he's taken. She already knows Kora and me, so we cant pretend for him, but you can. Please, its just for a bit, maybe a few days at most!" Then she paused and considered something. "It sounded like you had thought of this before. Like the consequences of being Rosto's gixie. You have, haven't you?"

"Umm…Well.." Again, what am I supposed to say? I had thought about it, but what would she think.

While smiling triumphantly, Aniki replied to my stuttering, "Kora and I knew that your rejecting Rosto was just denial. I'll bet you're still trying to avoid it, but face it. This'll be the perfect opportunity to test out your fears and curiosity." She patted my arm reassuringly, as if I were a little puppy about to meet my new dogs.

I was still in shock when we arrived at the Dancing Dove, and Aniki brushed me off before we entered and whispered to me, "Wait here. I'm gonna try to sneak into Kora's room to see if there's a dress you can borrow. I'll bring it down and you can change in that nook. Don't worry, I'll bring a sheet to cover you." Then she ran into the building. No one said that I'd have to dress in the middle of the street. I wasn't even sure if I was still going to this. I am going to tell Aniki I cant when she comes back. Too bad for Rosto, but he deserves it, chasing after mots who'll lash back at him with complaints. Gods know I wouldn't, but I'm not like Rosto's other gixies and I will never be his gixie.

Just as I was convincing myself of this, I heard Kora yelling "Hey, Aniki! Give me back my dress! You could've asked! Give it – uggh, go on ahead, but there BETTER be a good reason!" Aniki then came down and grabbed my arm and dragged me into an alley with a nook sunk in enough to act like a closet. She thrust me in with a bundle of clothes and stood while spreading a sheet. "You can change now Beka!" she ordered me.

I had to catch my breath and recover myself before I refused and said "No Aniki. I can't do this! Let me OUT!"

She huffed and began a pep talk. "Nope, you're gonna do this. Rosto's in enough trouble as it is and even though I think he deserves some wake up call like this, I am his friend, and so are you. Plus, this could be your chance to see if you do like Rosto enough to be in a relationship of sorts. Now CHANGE!"

I gave in with a few whimpers and started to change. It wasn't like she would let me out and she was right. I was Rosto's friend, and only that. And there was that little plus of pretending to be his gixie.

When I told Aniki I was good, she pulled me out, glanced at me. Then she squinted and started tweaking things like my hair or my dress. Then she nodded and pushed me toward the door. Winking, she took my arm and murmured, "Follow my lead."

I nodded and she turned the knob to reveal Rosto sitting on the stairs with an exasperated look while allowing this mot to complain and scold him. When Aniki announced "Hi Rosto. We're back. The market was a little held up but I brought your Beka in one piece," both he and the mot turned. I glared at her, knowing full well that I could take care of myself and she gave me a pointed look. But when my focus returned to the scene before me, I noticed Rosto's face was a lit up and the mot was frowning.

Taking my chances, I tried to put on a curious and slightly jealous tone to say, "Oh, am I interrupting something?"

Rosto immediately stood up and replied "No love. This is Tanille and we were just discussing something of no importance." Then he came towards me while Aniki backed off, smiling while rising up the stairs probably to tell Kora why she had stolen her dress.

Rosto took me by the waist and kissed my brow while whispering "Thank you."

"Friends help friends." I replied. There was no way I was letting him know that Aniki had been able to force me into this. I am not weak.

During our little exchange, the mot brushed past me while "accidentally" bumping into my shoulder. "Excuse me tramp," She spat. Turning to Rosto, she tried to seductively whisper "See you soon. If your need arises, you know where to find me." Finally, she opened the door, walked out with swaying hips and slammed the door. End of Act 1.


	4. I'll Last

**AN: So, hi again. I'm kind of not sure about this story so it'll be ending pretty soon, in the next 5 chapters or so unless I gain some new confidence or something. Anyways, Happy Holidays!**

**Disclaimer: Hey, wishes don't always come true, in fact, they hardly ever do.**

**Ch. 4: I'll Last**

**BPOV**

**After Watch**

Today I have lots to tell. One, there was a brawl at a nearby tavern and David and I had to take care of it. When we arrived, we only planned to relax for a while before heading out, but that wasn't to be. Pounce accompanied me instead of staying with Kora or Aniki. I was still recalling yesterday's act and I figured that we would never see the mot again, but that wasn't to be either, but that's later.

Anyways, as I finished drinking my bailey water, David and I heard a man announce, "This man cheated me of my money! He had fixed cards!"

David and I turned to see if there was any response, physical or oral and there was. "I didna' cheat! You just canna gamble and I won. Now leave it be!" The other man seemed insulted and before we could approach them, he punched the defendant. Well, that was all David and I needed to see before we could brake in. What didn't help was that there were enough drunken men in there who thought a brawl would be nice and started hitting random people near them. This made it just a tad bit harder seeing as that there wasn't just one fight to brake up now.

My baton was out and so was David's. Trying to find Pounce, I turned around with my arm out and my fist side punched a man running towards me. He backed up but came at me again with a knife. This time I was ready and my baton hit his neck and his stomach. He then knelt, whimpering in pain as he tried to walk out the exit. I turned to see who else there was to take but a fist came at me and I knelt, bringing my leg into a swipe under the man's legs and as he fell, I retrieved his knife and told him to leave or he would be arrested for trying to harm a dog. This went on for a time as I received bruises and scrapes, but nothing serious. When I finally finished with random drunks, David called to me and I turned. As soon as I did I felt a pain in my shoulder. I winced and felt warm streams seeping through my tunic. I twirled with my baton out, whacking something slightly hard and I heard and "ughh." Seeing that my baton had hit a man I had just fought, I assumed he had probably recovered from our fight before and decided to ignore my warning. I rammed him into the bar center with my good shoulder and hit the back of his knees with my baton. His body falling from his weakened knees, his head hit the bar shelf and he fell unconscious. I left him to help David and found that he had the two that started it all with ropes around their wrists.

After I had dodged and forced a few more drunks out, I reached David and helped him heave the two towards the exit of the tavern. Pounce had joined me by then and instead of leaping onto my shoulder, he scrutinized me. _You should go to the kennel now Beka. That isn't a minor cut. _I replied _No, I'm fine. I can last. _ I looked to David and observed that he had several minor cuts and an erupting bruise on his cheek but seemed fine. As I examined him, I guess he had been checking me for injuries and he asked, "Beka, where are you hurt?"

"David, its fine. I can just have a healer look at it when we get to the kennel with the men." I replied. It felt like a dagger had ripped my shoulder in two but it could wait.

"No Beka, we can call other dogs to take them to the kennel and we can get there faster."

I turned towards him and with my eyes I glared at him. He dropped the subject right after that and we started to drag the men to the kennel. Just because David dropped the subject didn't mean that Pounce did. _Beka, there is no way you'll make it. Just tell David and he'll let you go. He can handle this on his own._ I shook my head and replied _Pounce, its just a cut, it may be deep, but I'll live. Kora can take care of it. _

As we walked, I felt weaker and my shoulder was threatening to feel like a rock, stiff and heavy. I winced every time it was jostled and David would look at me, concerned. In turn, I would glare at him again and we keep going.

I started seeing black spots and dizziness was coming on. We weren't far and I thought I could make it. From what I am told, I just know that when we were not even five shops away from the kennel, I collapsed, making the man I was dragging fall on top of David and me to trip. He called the other dogs and some came and the men were taken into the cages while David was able to carry me with Pounce padding along behind us shaking his head.

When I awoke, I was in a kennel bed with some stitches. The healer was bustling around the room organizing her stored supplies. I ignored my pain and sat up asking, "Can I go now?"

The healer looked at me, shaking her head she said, "If you must, but you are to rest, no work! Ahuda said you have today and tomorrow from watch since you'll be no good without being able to use that arm." I slid off the bed and thanked her. Then Pounce leapt onto my head and said _I told you so._ I rolled my eyes as I walked out. Before I closed the door I heard "Remember, NO WORK!"

**AN: Sorry there was no Beka Rosto, but it'll lead there. **

**So, like I said, I'm loosing interest so this'll end pretty quickly. Sorry. Anyways, I might do another Beka Rosto, but different plot. Happy Holidays!**


	5. The Wink

**A/N: Hi peoples! So, thanks for the people who reviewed special mention for princessofcrown101 since she guessed some of the future and gave me an idea, plus she is a faithful reader. Thanks! Hope you still like my story, Happy Holidays! Oh and these entries are supposedly in her journal unless specified. Sorry if that wasn't clear.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone unless I created them, caphiche? Enjoy…**

**Ch. 5: The Wink**

**BPOV**

**After returning from the kennel**

Who knew Rosto could be so worried? Sure I hadn't come home at night but he knows my work can be dangerous. I was tired, weak and **in pain**, might I add, when I finally entered the Dancing Dove. When I started walking into the building, I was looking down so I had no idea that Rosto was the one to grab my hand, pull me inside and sit me down.

Well, I didn't know who it was and I was tired so I wasn't going to take any chances so I slammed the side of my hand into his arm and turned around to find Rosto holding his arm and wincing in pain. I am not guilty and still will not apologize. He should know not to scare me like that.

Finally, when I realized it was him I icily said, "Oh, its you." Sure, I have finally given into the notion that I do like Rosto, but I was tired, irritated that I couldn't be on watch for TWO days, and I was just annoyed that Rosto had to grab me like that.

"Yes its me. Where in Kiros' name have you been? Aniki and Kora have been worried and Erksen was pacing practically all night!" He growled at me. It was half menacing and half concerned. Would Rosto really care that much?

I am known for always having a comeback of my own so in order to not soil my reputation, I replied in a sarcastic curious tone, "Yet, why is you the one to grab me the moment I walk in?"

Instead of responding, Rosto turned his eyes on to me and bore them into me, glaring, well probably not all he had, but something close to it since I have seen meaner from him. I returned it with my icy purple eyes, but unlike David, he didn't back down.

All during this exchange, my shoulder hurt even more since it had never stopped hurting, it was just a duller pain than the fight I had been amidst. Since nothing but glaring was occurring, my pain came back and I winced and lightly shrugged my shoulders.

Rosto observed this and asked me with a voice that sounded not only curious but also, to my surprise, concerned. "Beka, why were you so late in returning from your watch?"

Thanking the gods that he had come to reasonable senses, I answered, "I was in a brawl and was stabbed in the shoulder. Apparently I collapsed and David took me to the kennel's healer and I stayed there the rest of the night." All of the anger in Rosto's face disappeared and he brought me into a hug, taking care to not hurt my shoulder any more.

My heart fluttered from the contact and the notion that Rosto might actually care for me, beyond the idea that I could be his bed warmer.

Then, we heard the doorknob turn and I sprang from the embrace, which had become me leaning against Rosto's chest while we sat on the stairs. He seemed reluctant to let me go, but my abrupt and forceful jump overpowered his firm but light cage that his arms formed around me.

I had feared that it was Aniki, Kora or Erksen, or even David, but it was only that mot from a few days ago.

"Tanille, what are you doing here?" Rosto asked in what seemed disbelief.

"I only came to see you Rosto. You haven't come by my room. Why not?" I gasped. She had asked him that as if I hadn't been there. Who cares if I wasn't Rosto's real gixie, she didn't know that and she had just interrupted a somewhat romantic position. Wait, did I just write that? Never mind, ignore that. I did not just think we were in a somewhat romantic position. I have got to stop writing that.

Interrupting my whirling thoughts, Rosto replied with cool and suave, "Well, I wish you would respect my Beka here. She is my gixie and means more than you did since she isn't just a bed warmer. I did not go to see you because of her. She is mine now. Gods know I've worked hard to finally capture her, but now that she is mine, I am keeping her regardless of any mots that throw themselves at me. Is there anything else you need from me? I would like to get back to holding my Beka." These were his exact words. I remember them clearly, like I would ever forget if my secret love sounded like he genuinely wanted me: naïve and resenting dog that I can be.

I looked up at him in surprise but was disappointed when I did since all Rosto did was wink at me. Even now, I am thinking to myself, why should I believe any of those words? Rosto's the king rat, meaning he can act if need be. So none of those words were true.

The mot huffed and threw me a menacing glare. Turning on her heel, she grabbed the doorknob again and right before she left, her head peeped in and she said in a no longer sweet voice, "My offers gone forever now Rosto. I hate you." Then she left, slamming the door again. That seems to be her only exit for the time I have known her.

"Good" Rosto muttered. Then, turning to me, he said, "Thank you Beka, you were the perfect actress. We were almost believable."

Not believing my ears, which I scold myself for even considering Rosto now, I looked at Rosto hard, gave a halfhearted smile and then threw a punch at his cheek. He looked surprised by my action, but I didn't stay long enough to answer his calling of "Beka! C'mon, what's wrong? What'd I do?"

I ran up the stairs, ignoring his calling and started to cry after slamming my own door. Rosto didn't even bother to come after me. Now, I sit here, writing this encounter down while scolding myself for even think about Rosto romantically. It can never happen. I knew that all his flirting was just for fun. Not only that, but I am a dog, he is the King of Rats. I am once again, in denial.

**Rosto POV**

**Right after Beka punched him**

"Beka! C'mon, what's wrong? What'd I do?" I called to her. I know that I'm using her, but why would she be so upset?

Finally ridding myself of Tanille is a burden off my chest, but I meant every word I said. I know Beka was only acting, but I wasn't. For a second, she looked surprised, as if she didn't know from all my flirting and half pretending serenades. I thought if I winked, then the ever denying and rejecting Beka would be fine and might dismiss my speech, but I truly did want her to know.

Now though, even after I stayed up all night, pacing and worrying, paranoid, making up the worst scenarios for Beka's absence and then holding her, she punches me! There is no way I am going to comfort her now, maybe later, but not now.

**Kora POV**

**After watching from Beka's arrival to Rosto's leaving to his room after pondering Beka's flee**

_Stupid, stupid Rosto! Go after her! What are you doing, thinking? Apparently._ Then, Rosto stood up and went to his room_. Ugghhhh! He won't even go and pick up the mess he made. I better go see if Beka's all right. It looked as is she might cry._

(Knocking on Beka's door)

"Beka, are you ok?" _Wait, why am I here? She doesn't know I saw that whole scene. Oh!_ "You didn't come back last night. Do you need me to heal something?"

I put my ear to the door and heard sniffles. "No, I'm fine Kora, but thank you. The healer at the kennel took care of it." _Oh, so she did get hurt._

"Alright. Well, I'll be in my room if you need me. Erksen and I would like to see you since you missed breakfast. I'll have supper ready for the three of us. 'Kay?"

"Sure Kora. See you then." _ That was clear dismissal. I hope she'll be ok._

**A/N: Man, I so had an opportunity to end the story this chapter, but I thought, "you know what? I'll keep it going" so I did. Anyways, I might have trouble updating tomorrow, but I will try, seriously. Please R&R. I'm getting hits and stuff, but only some people review. They help so much! Plus, there is more of a chance that I'll update. Sorry for this constant reviewers, but it'd be nice to see more.**

**Lots of love and thanks to reviewers,**

**Love.Always.Alice.&.Jasper.**


	6. Sorry!

Hi, sorry I can't update today. I will REALLY try tomorrow. My microsoft trial ended on my computer and the family ones screwed but I will try!

Sorry like a million times!


	7. Evil Rats

**A/N:** **So,** **sorry** **about** **the** **wait,** **but** **I** **still** **can't** **find** **a** **working** **comp** **with** **Microsoft,** **so** **I'll** **just** **use** **the** **notepad.** **Sorry** **again.**

**elorid'sdragonscrimbit:** I'll fix that! Thanks! I guess I mixed her up with Alanna, I know, gasp!

**Ch.** **6:** **Evil Rats**

**BPOV**

**Days** **later,** **After** **Watch**

I am very sorry I have not written in a while. I have been very busy, or just appearing to be very busy. I actually have no more to do than usual, but I have been avoiding the time I have to come home.

I have been ordered not to go to the kennel. Believe me, I tried, but Ahuda ignored me and literally kicked me out. Erksen helped me get home and what do you know, Rosto was there, with ANOTHER gixie. Well, I couldn't stay. I thought I was still his mot, but I guess last night's argument destroyed that. I then decided to avoid him, what good would it do to have him near. I had nothing to loose.

So, Aniki and Kora have both taken me shopping. Kora to healing shops and Aniki, well, clothes and guard shopping. She wanted to sharpen up her collection and I wanted to have something to do. I tried several times to go back to the kennel. I even begged Tunstall, David and Erksen to let me in on their watch, but they were all on strict orders that I was to rest. I told everyone who talked to Rosto and I not to tell him about my leave. I don't know why, I just didn't want him to know.

Pounce has been company, but not good company. But having something is better than having none at all, right? Now he is gone and I am bored. This seems to have been the pattern. Wake up, leave, do not attend breakfast meeting, walk around, beg to go on watch, fail, walk around aimlessly, return home, glare at Rosto, tend to the pigeons, cry, sleep. Throughout this, I have been very bored, but I have not seen Rosto except for when I enter and exit the tavern. Tomorrow I can go on watch again and cannot await. I will not have to find something to do for I will be catching evil rats, like Rosto.

**RPOV**

**While Beka is walking back to the tavern (not in a journal, thinking to himself)**

I just saw Beka go into her room. I guess that's all I have seen of her today. Yesterday I was lucky to see her thrice. Once leaving her room, then in town with Erksen and last, entering the tavern. The only time she actually looked content was with she was with Erksen. If it were any other cove, I would have taken this differently, but he is Kora's cove and he means well. I have been meaning to talk to her but I have had been busy, and I can never find her.

My guess is that my dog and turned fish puppy again. She has slipped from my reach, avoiding me. Sure, we had an row of sorts, but she must know that I was just worried and that my frustration poured forth. She was late and she punched me even after I stayed up all night, pacing and worrying, paranoid, making up the worst scenarios for Beka's absence. There was no way that I would go and comfort her then and there. I meant to afterwards, but Aniki growled at me when I neared her door. Growled! Then, when Beka had left the tavern, I met up with Pounce unexpectedly. At first, I just pet him and thought I was hearing things. Then I heard a _Yes you dolt! I, Pounce, Beka's TALKING cat is TALKING to you!_

I was startled. Sure, I knew that Beka would talk to her cat, but he had extended this courtesy to me. I was thinking something along these lines when again, he SPOKE to ME.

_Yes, Beka is not a crazy gixie talking to animals. As you know, I am The Cat. With this title comes power, and with power comes great responsibility! _I would know that, being Rogue,and he responded _But you are very immature when it comes to mostly mature puppies! _

At first I didn't know what Pounce was saying, so asked, Would you please explain that to me, a regular cove who cannot understand such godly talk? His response was a mrrrt...then a pause..._Have you seen Beka around?_ Of course I hadn't! Every time I saw her, she would turn, glare and leave. Her eyes would pierce me and I would get an uneasy feeling. Sure, I wouldn't want to be on the Terrier's bad side, but this was something more, as if her rejection were a damper on my life, clouding it over. Pounce was glaring at me while shaking his head Pounce said, _WHY must you and she be so ignorant? Of course she is avoiding you! She has every right to since your ignorance the other day. Do you know how stressed, annoyed and angry she was then? _ I opened my mouth to respond but he continued _Never mind, don't answer that. Obviously you didn't. Well, let me put it this way: Ahuda ordered that she could not go on watch for three days! _ He then paused, looking at my reaction. Why would this matter so much, but then I realized that her watch is practically what Beka lived for. Justice and the ruin of crime, rats and brawls, saving the people of the Lower City! _Yes...Anymore...? Fine, I will continue. The, you grabbed her. Did you not notice her wince when you brought her in while holding her arm. _I had noticed this because all I could take in was that she was home and of course I had been checking her for injuries and such but she didn't seem to have any, no blood, no limp. _ How can they call you Rogue? She had been to a healer, that's why she was late and why she looked fine, only tired. Your outburst not only jolted her, but it also hurt her. THen, while you showed only indifference even though you were truly worried, your old mot came in and you used her. She did not willingly go into your scheme willingly, Aniki practically forced her into that dress. She didn't like pretending. Also, your speech made her day, until it came falling down with your seeming indifference. Now, she has nothing to do, moping. Right now, she is anticipating tomorrow's watch, thinking about catching evil rats, like you._

That is when he turned on his tail and hightailed it out of my sight. His last sentence irked me a bit. Maybe I should try harder and ignore Kora and Aniki as they try and block me from Beka. I should have known Beka wouldn't willingly be my gixie. I knew it was all a facade, but it was nice to pretend that the illusion was real while it was nice. How could she think me an evil rat, like those who cheat and feed off the helpless? I now know that I have hurt her, but I have been a pretty fair Rogue, better than the one before. I will try tomorrow.

**A/N: So, this is nearing the end. I just wanted to thank my constant reviewer dreamtofly since she's been there since the beginning. Hope you liked this chapter, sorry if its not that good but I wanted to give you guys something.**

**Bye!**


	8. Blind Rats Falling Head Over Heels

**A/N: Hi! I am so sorry I haven't update in forever (ducking as tomatoes are thrown) but it seems as if every time I try and get ahead of school work, it ends up piling up and running me over. So sorry!**

Also, I have been told by some about Beka's eyes situation (thanks's dragonscrimbit, ProwlingKitKat and kitteezrule40). As of now, I cannot fix it, believe me, I've tried, but as soon as I manage to get to a working comp with Microsoft, then I will change it.

Another thing: Only Beka has a journal

**Disclaimer: ** Man, I always forget to do these, anyways, I do not own Beka and Rosto, but Tanille, no matter how bitchy and minor her role is, is still owned by me. Why bother? Adios and enjoy!

last chapter was her last day of rest so she is now back to work

**Ch. 7: Blind Rats Tripping Head Over Heels**

**BPOV (after watch)**

Good and bad news: Earlier, Rosto and I had agreed that the act was over. It was good since I no longer had to pretend for him and I allowed myself to speak to him civilly for the first time in the last few days. Bad, because now there is no chance to be around him without being mad around him.

Aniki, has told me that she was sorry for putting me through this and that I should give Rosto a chance to explain, but I said it wasn't her fault and that I had allowed myself to be in this situation and had made myself vulnerable. Every time we have this discussion, she gives me this look of pity and I want none of it. I have told her and Kora that before this, I had thought that I might fancy Rosto but now I now for sure. Then they admitted that they had hoped that this act would make me realize this but it had gone all wrong.

Today was my first day back at watch and David was kind and asked me how my vacation was. I said fine, but I think my expression said something else. I hadn't really truly smiled in a while, only pretended, especially in front of Rosto. He just nodded, not asking for more, and we kept walking away from the kennel.

The night was pretty uneventful and David offered to accompany me home and I scoffed and said that no, I was not his gixie. In response, he held his hands up in surrender and said "Alright, alright Beka. Can I walk with you as a friend? Possibly tell me why your blue eyes cannot smirk as they usually do?"

I agreed since I really do like David, but like a brother. We talked about nonsense and watch and joked around, but when we started to reach my building, David dragged me into an alleyway and said, "Beka, what's really wrong?" I didn't answer. I hadn't ever really confided in anyone except Pounce, Kora and Aniki, only them. But, if David really wasn't going to flirt as much, then I guessed I could talk to him. After all, I was stuck with him and this walk had proved to me that he could abstain from flirting for intervals of time.

I fessed up.

Flashback

"He can't do this to me. It started when Aniki kinda forced me into pretending to be Rosto's gixie..." I told him everything about Rosto's false speech and then paused. I didn't mention any of the talks I had with Aniki or Kora, that was for me to know, only me. I wanted to scream but only turned around, raised my hand to my hair, unbraided it and shook it, sighing. When I turned back, David was smirking and I growled "What are you smirking at?"

"You never take your hair out in front of me, only when...well I don't know when. That's it." Mithros damn him if that was it. I knew there was something else, it was obvious. I gestured for him to continue with my eyebrows raised. He laughed and finally took a breath and said "Beka, this whole time I have been flirting with you, so has another man. It turns out I am not the only one that cannot win you. The Rogue. I a mere dog having a bit of fun, but no, this Rogue is just as unsuccessful! But it also seems you are too blind just as he that he is just as head over heels as you, only he trips over his love while you go around it." Then the laughing continued. I threw my arms into the air and slid against the alley's walls, frowning at the maniac in front of me.

When he calmed down, he realized I was frowning and sat down next to me while taking out a knife to whittle a piece of fallen would with. I was so frustrated and my throat was tightening with tears that I was forcing back. "Sorry Beka. I shouldn't have laughed, but it seems you have a few too many coves after you. Me, it was all in fun, but this Rosto is a puzzle. Maybe he truly does want you, or maybe, like me, he is doing it all in fun." One tear then fell out of my eyes. Damn that tear. David put an arm on my shoulders and continued. "In his case, it is cruel since he is playing you." Then, couldn't hold them anymore and they all came. DAMN them, I am not a sissy who cries all the time.

I think that David was a little shocked at my tears since I never cried, I never even fessed up my pains. Awkwardly, he patted my back, but finally, he settled on resting my head in the nook between his neck and shoulders. There, my tears fell and stained wet his tunic. Good thing they were black, my tears wouldn't stain it.

When I finally cried myself out, he held his hand out to me and we finished the minute walk to my building, his arm around my shoulders and my head leaning on his frame with my arm around his waist. Before he left me inside the building, he faced my and wiped at my red cheeks and whispered, "It'll get better, I promise, even if I have to knock Rosto myself. He'll understand later. For now, if you ever need a friend, find me, wherever I am, anytime." I hugged him and gave him a peck on the cheek in response. Once David left, I could have sworn that I saw Rosto's outline in the shadows, but it was probably my wishful thinking. I must tend to Pounce and then go to sleep, crying really tires me out.

**Rosto POV (walking after Beka arrived)**

**I thought, for one second that I could talk to Beka for once in days, even have her for myself, but that David came in. For him to even think that he could take the Rogue's gixie for himself, well, next time, he'll be getting a black eye and a few marks to prove to him how wrong it is. True, Beka is not mine, but everyone can see how I want her so. Some warn me that nothing good can come of it, but I think that my love will surpass any problems. I don't know what I did that was so wrong, but if she cannot talk to me sooner or later, I will have to give up. I know I will always love her, but I cannot force her to love me.**

**A/N: I know, not the longest or best, but I hope it can ease any flames that my come my way.**


	9. Don't Know What You Got 'Til It's Gone

**A/N: Don't kill me. I know I haven't updated in forever and I don't have an excuse, I've just been lazy. Sorry, really.**

**Disclaimer: Why bother? I got Beka's eye color wrong before, how could I possibly be the writer?**

**Ch. 8: Don't Know What You've Got 'Til You Loose It**

**RPOV**

Today Beka and I actually spoke. She wasn't in the room when entered so I sat next to Aniki, and started eating. Aniki then said, "I would sit somewhere else." I looked at her puzzled, did Aniki hate me now? I guess she saw my puzzled look and said, "Beka's sitting there, she'll be back, she's just getting her friend David." My heart dropped. I stopped eating and Aniki gave me a look of pity. I tried to brush it off and continued eating staying firmly in **my** spot. How dare she bring David to a breakfast, its just for us, not others. And before anyone assumes anything, I am NOT jealous, I am just merely mad that she would bring an outsider. Aniki probably sensed my inner turmoil and whispered, "Rosto, relax, she's just walled up now. She was hurt badly by someone, she's only opening up to few. Let her have her dog friends." That was just it, what if this dog was better than I. I was a rat, David was a dog, apparently he was good looking to according to Aniki's previous conversations with Beka. What if he was officially taking away my Beka?

**Aniki POV**

Mithros! That cove is denser than a drunk dog. I told him about Beka being hurt to hint to him! He doesn't get it. Do I have to say "YOU hurt her"in his face? He deserves to worry about competition. He may be my friend but he needs to make an effort!

**BPOV (Present not journal)**

David and I were just approaching the group when I noticed Rosto was siting in my place. I looked to Aniki. She knew about my troubles, but all she did was shrug as if saying sorry. She was petting an uncomfortable looking Pounce and he pleaded to me _Really Beka, just sit somewhere else. Or, if you must, make a fuss but hurry please, I need to eat and Aniki won't let me go!_ I rolled my eyes and walked to Rosto's eating form. I told him "I was sitting there." He shrugged. He looked my way and replied "There are other places to sit. Finders keepers losers weepers." Somehow, his eyes seemed stone hard, angry yet I still fell in them, wanting to stroke his blonde white hair that fell from his pony tail. Shaking it off I retorted "Childish taunts won't get you anywhere."

Then David's hand rested on my shoulder and he asked me "Beka, we could go to a tavern nearby. On the way here I saw a woman selling some tasting looking fritters." He and I had agreed that we could spend the day together before night watch, just getting some apple crisps and walking around, talking with a strict rule of no flirting. He had said he would try, but for him it was fun, but he would try.

I shrugged and looked at him with a smile. "Sure, they sound awfully good." When I turned to say goodbye to Aniki, she smiled sympathetically as did Kora. Erksen, who usually tried to convince me to stop being so cold to Rosto, didn't even bother to point out that they already had apple fritters, he let it pass, he had acknowledged that Rosto and I were in disagreement now and that neither would give. It seems he didn't have to either, for Rosto was fast on noticing this, he was eating an apple fritter after all.

"C'mon Beka, we've got fritters here. I'll get up. C'mon." I paused, he had complied to late but I didn't have an excuse.

"Actually, I prefer cherry fritters Rosto. Apple's just fine, but today I feel in the mood for cherry and the lady had some, thank you though." David answered. I smiled at him. He had saved me form humiliation.

"That's it then. See you 'round Aniki and Kora." Then I smirked at Erksen, "Don't let Kora hold you up. Don't want to be late to watch and have Ahuda's wrath to face again, right Erksen." He just rolled his eyes and shook his head, trying to hide the obvious blush. Kora just giggled. They were so lucky to have each other.

I didn't bother saying bye to Rosto. As I left, I saw David mock bowing to Aniki and Kora, bidding them adieu, and saluting Erksen who was rising from his seat. Aniki just giggled and shooed him off. as Kora cooed to Erksen. I laughed, sometimes Erksen took things too seriously.

David's face beamed and smirked as we walked away. Then, I asked him "Where to discoverer of these magnificent _cherry_ fritters." He laughed and pointed towards a street. With his arm draped around my shoulders, I felt comforted. I knew that he was just a brother to me and a good looking teddy bear. I leaned into his hold and he squeezed. Then, he said, "No kidding. The guy is dense and stubborn." I laughed, he was trying to lighten my mood and it was working. It was nice to laugh at Rosto even if I did love him.

**David POV**

Man, the guy was dense, good looking and strong, but dense. The whole time I was there anyone could tell he was jealous, of me. Ha, the Rogue was jealous of me, a dog. Too bad he didn't know that I had agreed to only be Beka's friend, not her cove. Her sagging shoulders showed that she needed a definite comfort and here I was, I would be her teddy bear for now.

**Rosto POV**

I didn't mean for her to leave. True, I wanted to annoy her, but only because she brought David. Now, she's alone with him. I heard them laugh, I saw him hug her. That should be me, not him. I don't like this feeling of loss. I've known that I've liked her, found her intriguing, but I feel empty without her jibes and sarcasm. I need her, I will not loose her.


	10. Ready?

**A/N: Ok, I am soooooo sorry that I haven't updated in forever, hopefully you won't kill me because if you do, there's no more story.**

**Ch. 9:**

**BPOV (Right before she leaves)**

Today, I am rejoicing, I am FREE, well not really, but I am to leave the Lower City and go to Scanra to help with the rioting. David, a more experienced dog who isn't necessarily required as of now in a time where we only have an average number of trouble, unlike other times, was assigned to go to Scanra. Then, he asked me to go along. At first I was hesitant, but Pounce scolded me for passing up this opportunity. He said _Why not show Ahuda that you can handle the outside world beyond the Lower City. It'll also give you and I a taste of other places. I would like to see how the cats in Scanra are treated._

At first I thought he was joking but even right now, Pounce is keeping me to my promise to find David before sundown and tell him that I will accompany him. Like now for instance. He can't stop pacing by the door as I write, saying, _We haven't got all day! How much more does she have to write?_ Oh, now he's glaring at me for writing down his conversation with himself. Seems like I should go.

So, now I get to escape the pitiful looks of Aniki and Kora and I don't have to work at avoiding Rosto. Actually, David has been the greatest help. He and I like to walk around the Lower City talking, eating and then patrols have been full of catches. Lately, Rosto has had less of a hold on his rats and we've got many, really, more than just the normal few. I wonder what's bothering him.

I really, should stop now. I will write soon, but with all the traveling it will be harder. _And this is the how manyth time you've written that._ Of course Pounce had to throw that in. _Like I though, I saw it written twice, now let's go before David leaves without us._ Like David would be such a cruel rat, really.

**RPOV (Just as she is leaving)**

She's leaving. She. Is. Leaving. MY Beka is LEAVING. And with that dog David no less. Supposedly it is for patrolling, but what if Scanra, my past, wants her permanently. She is one that everyone loves, even I. Yes, I have admitted it. But, what if they want to keep her and she accepts. She really doesn't have anything here to keep her, at least not that I know of.

Of course, David would probably stay with her, being another good dog. They are partners, a position of which I am so jealous of. Why couldn't she choose to be apart of my court. She would do so well. Like that day when she stole that package from me without any hesitance. Of course, I was slightly distracted by her, but that's just part of her job. Then this whole problem wouldn't exist. No dog vs. rat tension, no need for avoiding the subject, we could co exist. And in more than one way. Without the tension, she could probably see that I want more than just friendship, more than just a simple hug, more than the every so often chat. I want more. Is that too much for me to ask?

Is it?

No, it isn't. I have worked hard to become what I am. Yes, I am the Rogue that can have any mot with my looks and charm, but not Beka apparentally. But that is probably why I was so drawn to her at first. She didn't gasp or swoon, well not entirely, when she first saw me. Nor did she pursue m afterwards, in fact, it was I who made a point of happening upon each other by just mere coincidence.

Why should I be sitting here, letting her leave? This is probably me one chance at finding some release from my life. She is my release, and despite the idea that all I've worked for is power, I have come to find that maybe that's not all. Maybe, I want more to life.

True, I have the wealth, status, power, yet I still feel empty. Now more so since it seems almost impossible for me to obtain my heart's true desire.

No longer will I wait. No, I am going. Either following her to the fiery pits of Mythros' rage or just to grovel at her feet. This ought to be the first time I've every truly contemplated groveling.

**David POV (They are in the stables)**

Stupid, stupid Beka. She has had such a bad time lately and this seemed like the perfect opportunity to take her away from it all.

I thought maybe that strong bull headed Almighty Rogue would step down from his throne to apologize or acknowledge her, but no apocalypse has occurred. Maybe I thought to highly of him. I thought he really did have it in him, but I was wrong.

"Are you ready?" I jumped. Mythros, Beka was too quiet for any rat's good.

"Of course. I even had time to ready your horse for you. Ahuda gave us some money for supplies and I thought we might as well pick up some and save some money for later throughout the trip. Does that seem good?" Really, she scared me, but seeing her decked out in her uniform, weapons visible and some hidden I'm ready to bet, leaning on the stable walls, I can't help but wonder how she hides all the pain and conflict.

"Thank you. That's great. Don't you agree Pounce?" She looked to her cat, and it almost seemed as if I could understand him. No one could understand their connection, even after Beka explained it to me.

As soon as I nodded, I rose from my sitting position against the stables and stepped towards my bay. Rising onto the horse with such ease, I understood why I held Beka with such admiration, repsect and protection. She is like the younger and brave sister I never had being the younger brother of a truly girly mot.

**A/N: Don't worry, I'll update soon, way faster than I just did. Again, I'm really sorry. Hope you review if you don't hate me.**


	11. Just Don't Get Too Old

**A/N: Hello, I know its been forever, sorry, but finals and all, just kept catching up to me but now I am free and will be for a while. And then, my wifi got all screwed up. So much for having easy access... anyways, onto the story.**

**Disclaimer: Nope, last time I looked in the mirror, I didn't look like Tamora Pierce, but I'll keep you updated if I suddenly start to.**

**GRAND FINALE... hope you enjoy. It was gonna be a two parter, but then I thought, I made you wait long enough and you deserved a long one, and its hard cuz it seems a lot longer on word.**

**And now, may I present the last chapter of **_**I Don't Want It, I Think...?**_

**Ch. 10: Just Don't Get Too Old**

Rosto ran, and ran, and ran, and ran and then ran some more. Then he ran some more after that. And then he, well, you get the idea. But as much as he ran, he couldn't find her. Her, the one he cared for so much. And he had just realized it! Why, stupid him, how come he didn't realize it before!? Now it was too late! She might leave if he didn't find her in time. Where could she be?

He had checked her room, had check with Aniki, Kora, checked with her elder dogs, but none of them knew. Now, he was going to check with Ahuda. She had to know! Of course!

There, he would check there!

Pushing back his flying white-blonde hair from his eyes, Rosto brushed against the crowded streets, jumping over miscellaneous boxes, squeezing through carts and people walking by. At one point, there were two carts and people polluting the road and in his rush, he jumped as he could. With his agility, the jump was quite easy and landing lightly, he continued on, taking no notice of the stares.

The crowds surrounding him though, were in awe, what would the king rat hurry so much for? What dog or rat was he chasing after that his smaller rats could not?

How wrong they were. Everyone knew of the somewhat secretive relationship between the king rat and the terrier, but no one knew quite what. And as scandalous and intriguing as that relationship was, it occurred to none of them that Rosto the Piper might have had a heart in which that recently made dog held solely.

When Rosto paused at the door of the dog's building, the sight of the king rat quickly fixing himself up before raised some eyebrows. Again, what business would he have their during the day?

**Ahuda's POV**

Slightly raising my head at the opening of the door, I noticed the King Rat within my walls. Why would _he_ be here? "What your business be here?"

He came forward and it was clear he had been running with a light sheen of sweat. Prob'ly for a while cuz he seemed pretty fit.

Boldly, he set his hands on my desk of sorts and leaned forward. "Where is Beka?" Oooh! He wants to know where my terrier is.

"Out. Gone I think. But why should I be tellin' you this?"

"I need to know."

"That's not a good enough answer." And now he frowns! Ha! He come expectin' such information, such arrogance...

"Besides, I would 'na know anyways. I just know where and why she is gone, but not when today she will leave. Ask others who might know."

Then, to my surprise, he does not leave but instead, says "That's exactly what I've been doing!"

"Whom have you asked...?"

"Her friends, people around, and now you. I have gone to such lengths to ask you, Ahuda, my puppy's trainer, the one who gave her those bruises and welts. The strong Ahuda! And now you don't even know if she's left for good or if she is still here." Somehow, it seems he has internally fallen. His eyes aren't as fierce and he's left the last breathe out of his body. I told Beka not to fall for this rat, she is a dog, but it seems it wasn't my choice.

I'll tell him what I can, I suppose.

"You haven't asked David's friends. Do that. At least his friends would know when he rose and left. Seems you aren't as sharp as my dogs. Leave now. Your disturbin' the area." Of course, this wasn't true, he and I are the only ones in.

Not that he notices though, he nods and although his eyes aren't as bright as before, they seem to pick up a bit.

Finally, he leaves, running might I add.

**No POV**

Running still, and trying to forget that he might never see Beka again, Rosto began his running, again. Reaching the The Hill, David's choice of stay, he burst in, looking for the men he's seen David around when not with Beka (yes, Rosto's done his share of looking (spying more or less) of the one he is jealous of. Yes, it does happen and if he wasn't at it, then some of his rats were). Grabbing one by the collar of his shirt, he hisses "Have they left yet?!"

Stunned, the man stutters "Maybe, David said the gixie might go with him. He left to the Bay Stables a while ago. 'Bout two drinks ago for us." Satisfied, Rosto thrust the man down, nodded and stormed out.

Internally, he was raging. What right would David have to drink a'fore a journey with his Beka? He wouldn't be in top condition to fight and protect her! Then, running left and through a few allies, he arrived at the stables, just in time to see Beka petting a dusty gray mare with white hair. Cooing to her. Running with last of his strength, he snatched her up, lifting her into his arms, twirling her as he buried his face into the crook of her neck.

**BPOV (in her journal that night)**

For once, there is a lot to write. First, little details first, Pounce is growling in his sleep, I find that quite funny. Him rolling on his back, legs jerking or kicking out. David is sleeping in his cot under the tree and I am by the edge of the pathways,writing to you.

My mother thought she loved a rat, but then she found that she loved the young romantic one who wooed her, not that same one who later beat her and cared naught for her. I don't want that. But can I really take Rosto's assurance for that.

I've gone from depressed, broken, but somewhat mended, elated, to sad again. All in one day. This morning, I awoke, finally deciding to leave with David since I could 'na stay here with Rosto's cold moods. (I swear, sometimes he is moodier than a mot with child) Then, when David said I could come and that we would leave after he collected some last things, I felt somewhat relieved, content, but not quite. Then came my happiness.

I was just cooin' to Sea, the pretty bay David gave to me for now and in comes Rosto. He lifted me up and twirled me around. I have to say, the last time I've been lifted like a child was when Tunstall congratulated me on making dog. Anyways, Rosto started muttering into my ear and I, shocked to say the least, started pushing him off me. I thought he hated me and I was supposed to hate him in return. Not get the butterflies I had, or want, actually need his arms around me.

"Let me go Rosto! David's coming soon." His muttering paused and his eyes looked up into mine and I saw something in them, I don't know what cuz next thing I knew was that all I wanted were Rosto's lips. His kiss was hard and urgent but still caressing and loving. Maybe that's all in my dreams, but his lips made me jump and melt at the same time. I began to run my hands through his white blond hair, needing this kiss before I left.

Finally, he broke away from me, looked me straight in the eyes and said in a slightly husky panting voice, "I, Rosto the Piper, love you Beka Cooper. I don't care about me being a rat, the king of them, or you being a dog, a terrier. I just want you. You, Beka. I want and love you." Stunned, I was silent. Weren't we just hating each other a moment ago...?

"Never, I never hated you, I was only jealous." Apparently I had said that out loud. Finally, I spoke, my lips still tingling.

"Who? Who did you hate?"

Giving me a perplexed look, as I should know, Rosto said, "David." It seems he's loathed that name for a while. I laughed, he thought I was with David!

Amidst this, Rosto had put me down, giving me the chance to bury my face in his chest, grabbing the cloth and hiding myself in it as I laughed. Rosto's hands tightened around my waist as I said, "I was never David's gixie, only a friend." Pausing, I sighed and decided to finally say what I felt. "And, I love you, Rosto."

"Good, and you better come back. Don't be leavin' me for a cove in Scanra." Then, he kissed me again. It was sweet at first, but then as I pushed myself closer to him, he tightened his grip around me and our secrets burst out, mouths opening for more.

Then, embarrassingly enough, David, decided to come in then and cough lightly. I blushed, Rosto just tucked my head under his chin as he told David, "Take care of her. Don't let her get one scratch or I will set my rats on you." I glared at him. He knew I could take care of myself.

"Don't worry, Beka can take care of herself. She is the terrier." I nodded my thanks to him and-lightly slapped Rosto's shoulder and he only smirked at me, that one smirk flipped my stomach.

"Just wanted my gixie taken care of." I'll be anything that my eyes lit up. I was now his gixie.

Tippy-toeing up, I whispered into his ear "I'll be back. Maybe we shouldn't tell anyone just yet. I'll be back, as soon as possible. I miss you already."

He whispered back, "You better, and when you do, my room will be open for my queen. We can tell Aniki and Kora when you come back. I'll bet they've been planning something for us already. And remember, as long as you are gone, I love you Beka Cooper, my terrier."

Looking into his eyes, so I could remember them clearly, I told him "And I love you. Just don't get too old..."He frowned, lifting his hands to his face. I laughed as I nodded towards his blonde white hair. Then he just laughed, relieved, kissing me fiercely. Finally, he let me go, I pecked him on the cheek, mounting Sea.

When I trotted away, I looked back and saw Rosto salute to me, I blushed and laughed. Smirking, David just said, "Of course." Shaking his head, he pushed a little forward.

Now, I write to you, of my day ,the best one yet of my life. And I will go back. Rosto will wait for me. Back to the Dancing Dove. And although Rosto's a rat, and I'm a dog, we'll get past it, I'm sure.

Now, I have to sleep. ' Night.

**THE END**

**A/N: Finally, I know. Hoped you liked it. Sooo... just so you know, I was going to change my name soon. I've loved the name Love.Always.Alice.Jasper. but now I'm gonna change it, or at least soon, to Black.and.Purple.Roses. that way more of my accounts will match. I bid you adieu for now.**


	12. We Belong Together

ariah Carey Lyrics

So...Usually I dont like her songs, but this one just stuck out at me when my mom was listening to her cuz i thought it kinda fit with the story. just go on you tube if you feel like it. her voice is actually pretty amazing, just not my style.

We Belong Together

Mariah Carey

I didn't mean it

When I said I didn't love you so

I should have held on tight

I never should've let you go

I didn't know nothing

I was stupid

I was foolish

I was lying to myself

I couldn't have fathomed that I would ever

Be without your love

Never imagined I'd be

Sitting here beside myself

'Guess I didn't know you

'Guess I didn't know me

But I thought I knew everything

I never felt

The feeling that I'm feeling

Now that I don't

Hear your voice

Or have your touch and kiss your lips

'Cause I don't have a choice

Oh, what I wouldn't give

To have you lying by my side

Right here, 'cause baby

Chorus:

When you left

I lost a part of me

It's still so hard to believe

Come back baby please, 'cause

We belong together

Who else am I gonna lean on

When times get rough?

Who's gonna talk to me on the phone

Till the sun comes up?

Who's gonna take your place?

There ain't nobody better

Oh baby, baby

We belong together

I can't sleep at night

When you are on my mind

Bobby Womack's on the radio

Singing to me

'If you think you're lonely now'

Wait a minute

This is too deep, too deep

I gotta change the station

So I turn the dial

Trying to catch a break

And then I hear Babyface

I only think of you

And it's breaking my heart

I'm trying to keep it together

But I'm falling apart

I'm feeling all out of my element

I'm throwing things

Crying

Trying to figure out

Where the hell I went wrong

The pain reflected in this song

Ain't even half of what

I'm feeling inside

I need you

Need you back in my life (in my life, in my life), baby

Chorus

Baby!

Repeat chorus

When you left

I lost a part of me

It's still so hard to believe

Come back, baby, please, 'cause

We belong together

Who am I gonna lean on

When times get rough?

Who's gonna talk to me

Till the sun comes up?

Who's gonna take your place?

There ain't nobody better.

Oh baby, baby

We belong together


End file.
